Monday, May 09, 2005

Hello, Officer...

I've never gotten pulled over while driving, but I got pulled over by the Coast Guard while kayaking the other morning. Tree-hugger that I am, I had been picking up litter in the marsh while the boys fished...and one of the things I picked up was a 32 gallon grey trash can. Since it didn't fit in the boat (it's a small 12 foot recreational kayak) I turned it upside down and balanced it on the rear deck. We were crossing the river when the little inflatable Coast Guard boat pulled up beside us with the blue lights flashing.
They were just curious what the grey thing on the back of my boat was. One of them asked if I was "smuggling children" in it. In hindsight, telling them it was a "Mr. Fission" like in Back to the Future would have been fun, but since they're now assigned to Homeland Security and not the Department of Transportation, making jokes about anything nuclear probably would not have been wise. It turned out okay and none of us were taken to holding cells in undisclosed locations.
The Coast Guard guys decided to take the trash can back to the station with them since they were headed in. They did almost hit a snag in this little plan when the captain evidentally woke up from his nap and asked what they were doing. They tried to explain how they were aiding a boater, but the captain's only question was, "what are we going to do with it?" Incidentally, I found a very similar trash can in the marsh yesterday just downstream from where the Coast Guard pulled us over...but they wouldn't do that, would they?!?!


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